


And here you are living, Despite it all

by A_Tomb_With_A_View



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alex and Reggie are Literal Brothers, Alex has anxiety, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Anxiety, Author has fibromyalgia, F/M, I guess???, Ig there’s a little bit of angst, Interviews, It’s sunset curve not sunset straight, M/M, Reggie has fibromyalgia, Snapshots, TW: mentions of opioid/drug abuse, The boys worship the ground Julie and Flynn walk on, This was supposed to be angst?, as they should - Freeform, but here we are, but not as much as I planned for, didn’t plan for Reggie/Bobby, fibromyalgia, honestly this thing gained sentience
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2020-11-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:15:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27624598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Tomb_With_A_View/pseuds/A_Tomb_With_A_View
Summary: “Duh,” Reggie said, looking at his boys. “They’re my family. Blood family doesn’t mean anything, we’ve proven that. But these guys, and Julie and Flynn and Willie? They’re the family I chose, and even when Alex and Luke asked me every five minutes on our wedding day if I was sure I felt okay and if I needed a hot water bottle or a painkiller, I’ve never doubted that choice for a second.”
Relationships: Alex & Bobby | Trevor Wilson & Luke Patterson & Reggie, Alex & Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex & Willie & Reggie & Luke Patterson & Bobby & Julie Molina & flynn, Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Bobby | Trevor Wilson/Reggie, Julie Molina/Luke Patterson (mentioned), Kayla/Carrie Wilson (mentioned), Reggie & Luke Patterson, Reggie & Willie (Julie and The Phantoms)
Comments: 52
Kudos: 291





	And here you are living, Despite it all

**Author's Note:**

> Firstly: there will be two jasico chapters next week for those of you keeping up with that, I had a massive migraine Monday night and it just Would Not Happen so sorry abt that one lo  
> Secondly: uh, mild disclaimer: in this fic Reggie deals with Fibromyalgia, his pain and medication experiences are based almost entirely off my own, which I also got at 15 (two years ago), so if this doesn’t sound like your own experience, I’m sorry, I’m definitely not an expert or authority, it’s just how I’ve had it  
> Thirdly: honestly, this totally got away from me, it was supposed to be traumatised and hurting Reggie but something in my mind was like hmm that would make you process your shit? And writing a depressing fic about someone dealing with my personal issues would’ve been.... not very fun for me, lol  
> Fourthly: did I mean to write a Bobby/Reggie fic? No, this was supposed to be in ‘verse, but I scrapped what I had and ended up with this, you can thank willex-Joyner on tumblr for my Bobby obsession, and the 900 word Bobby&willie bonding ficlet sitting in my drafts that I ended up with after trying out a prompt generator lol  
> Anywho: enjoy!

**Sophomore year (15)**

Reggie was pretty sure he was somewhere in the seventh circle of hell. 

Last year, Bobby had had to do a presentation on Dante’s Inferno to make up the credits from a project he’d missed during a suspension he’d served for threatening to beat up a teacher who’d tried to grab Alex during a panic attack. Honestly, Reggie had ignored most of the many practices he’d done of his speech, but for some reason, his explanation of the circles of hell had stuck with him. 

The seventh circle had three rings: one filled with blood and fire for murderers and thugs, the middle one where those who committed suicide were turned into trees and fed upon by harpies, and the central one full of burning sand and rain for blasphemers and sodomites. 

He couldn’t exactly place which ring he was in, although it probably wasn’t the middle, his brain was too cloudy with pain to discern whether he felt like he was boiling in blood or standing in a burning desert whilst fiery rain poured down on him. Probably the former, although according to the pastor at Alex’s church, he’d be much better suited to the latter. 

_ Alex. _

Alex would know what to do, and he’d probably be awake - he never slept the night before they had something slightly illegal planned, and the club they were playing tomorrow thought they were of legal age, which was… well, not accurate enough for Alex’s peace of mind, that was for sure - and Reggie’s dad was staying at his sister’s for the week after his mom had thrown a fit about how he’d thrown something at the wall during an argument, so the phone in the spare room was unlikely to ring with any late night calls that his dad would need to take. Plus, Alex was the only one who’s number he had memorised, and since he’d broken his own, he didn’t really have another option. 

Next obstacle? Getting his limbs and his brain to cooperate long enough to make it to the spare room. Usually, it wouldn’t be a problem. Reggie was skinny and light on his feet and bouncing with enough energy that bouncing along the non-creaky floorboards was a piece of piss, but for some reason his ribs felt like he was attempting to fit back into Alex’s big sister’s corset that she’d bought for some drama production or something when she was thirteen, and his chest felt like someone had coated their hand in molten metal and was attempting to prise his heart out through sheer will, which was making it difficult to prop himself up against the wall, nevermind stand up and summon enough conscious thought to get him silently to the spare room. 

He started small, leaning against the wall until he was stood up, hand over his mouth just in case his breathing woke his mom. Once the room stopped spinning and his heart stopped pounding in his ears, he pushed forward. 

By the time he reached the spare room, he was pretty sure he’d tripped twice and stood on every single creaky floorboard there was to step on, but whether his mom had been drinking or was just sleeping really deeply, something kept her in bed, which was good, because without his dad home, Reggie had been sleeping through the night for the first time since the fighting had gotten bad in sixth grade, and it would be just like his mom to ring his dad even now, at two in the morning, to drag him home to yell about who’s fault it was that Reggie was creeping about in the wee hours. 

It took him four tries to get his hands to stop shaking long enough that he could punch in Alex’s number, and he was pretty sure his heart stopped at least once in the time it took Alex to pick up. 

“Reggie I swear to god-”

“‘Lex I’m not fucking around… I think I’m dying,” Reggie blurted, laying himself out carefully on the bed, wincing and readjusting over and over until he found a position that was slightly less awful than all the others. 

“Do you need me to come over?” Alex asked immediately, all traces of irritation wiped from his tone. “Do you need to go to a hospital?” 

“I-I don’t know, ‘Lex we can’t afford a hospital, man, not if it’s bad.” 

Alex cursed under his breath. “I can.”

“They’ll kill you, dude, I can’t ask you to do that.” Reggie groaned as pain pulsed in his sternum. “I know they don’t like me.”

“I’ll go on a date with Kayla from the dance club,” Alex offered, and Reggie could hear the sound of him grabbing keys and shutting the front door in the background. “And I’ll have to miss band practice next Thursday to, fuck, to do that choir solo mom’s been bugging me about, but it’ll be fine.” 

“Are you sure? You, Christ on a  _ bike _ , you hate choir solos.” Reggie paused to wipe the tears stinging his eyes. “And girls, bro.” 

“Kayla’s foster brother is cute,” Alex joked, though the panic in his voice was still audible. “...and we kissed behind the locker room three weeks ago. I’ll just say I want him to chaperone. And you think I wouldn’t deal with a choir solo for you, man?” 

“Get you,” Reggie laughed weakly. “Getting more action behind the locker room in the two years since you’ve come out than Luke and I have combined, ever.”

“Seriously, Reg,” Alex persisted. “I love you, and the guys, and I can deal with three and a half minutes of stage fright if the other option is letting you writhe around in pain for hours.” 

“Don’t bullshit me, ‘Lex.” The pain began to ease a little, and he relaxed, scrubbing a hand through his hair. “It’s not three and a half minutes of stage fright, it’s hours of panicking beforehand and not sleeping and panicking afterwards. But… thanks, yeah? I love you too.” 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. You sound a bit better, so you can you climb out or do I need to come get you? I’m two minutes away, and I’m gonna ring Bobby and Luke so they meet us at the hospital.”

“Wait, no,” Reggie protested. “You don’t gotta bother them. I’m fine.” 

“Reginald,” Alex warned, panic traded for the stern tone he rarely brought out. “Firstly, you told me you thought you were dying and if you are then I am  _ not  _ doing this alone, and secondly, even if you’re not, I need to tell them that they have to fully support me dating a girl. I’m out front.” 

Reggie sighed and hung up. Walking two doors down from his bedroom to the spare had been hard enough, and there was no way he was getting down the stairs without waking his mom. The only other viable way out was going back to his room and hoping he’d regained enough strength to climb down the tree next to his window. He breathed out slowly and started walking. 

Honestly, Reggie acknowledged, having made it back to his room with shaking legs and tears falling silently, his saving grace was definitely that Luke had strung up a rope swing six months ago. It was going to hurt like all fucking hell, but some rope burn from lowering himself onto the tyre was going to heal a lot quicker than the myriad of splinters and grazing he’d likely get trying to climb down the tree itself. 

He lowered himself down onto the tyre, allowing himself a brief pause to sob into his t-shirt before he pulled himself together. Alex was waiting for him. 

When he reached the car, Alex practically threw himself out. “Sweet baby Jesus,” he murmured, holding a cool hand against Reggie’s forehead. “Fuck, Reg, you’re burning up, c’mon.” He bundled Reggie into the car much more carefully than he expected - although Alex was always more gentle than he expected, with all of them - and in between blinks, he was distantly aware of the drive to the hospital, of Bobby and Luke running up to greet them, of a glorious numbness crashing over him in waves. 

——

**Junior Year (16)**

According to Bobby, Reggie was lucky he hadn’t ended up hooked on the opioids they’d given him at the hospital. Normally Reggie took the random statements Bobby sprouted with a pinch of salt, but he remembered how numb everything had felt when they’d given him the morphine, the drowsiness of the following weeks of codeine where nothing was quite real, how fun nights with the boys had been at the start of every month when he’d increased his amitriptyline dose. He’d not suffered withdrawal, but if someone offered him a night of that same bliss, of crashing asleep before the yelling could start, of not waking up until his dad was gone for work, of not feeling panicked when his teachers yelled, or unreasonably irritable when a test didn’t go his way, well… it would be tempting, that was for sure. 

It was his boys who’d brought him out of it; Bobby who dragged him to band practice and reminded him that not feeling bad wasn’t anywhere near worth losing how  _ alive  _ he felt on a stage, bass in hand, jamming with his boys; Alex who taught him to handle his stress so that he didn’t feel like someone was kicking his ribs or trying to snatch his heart straight from his chest when a door slammed, who welcomed him at all hours with open arms when things were just  _ toomuch _ ; Luke who added  _ Reggie’s Flares  _ to the two item list of Acceptable Reasons To Miss Band Practice that was stuck to the fridge door in Bobby’s garage, who spent hours researching fibromyalgia with the same ferocity as he wrote music and would waltz into the garage with a different remedy each week, determined to help his best friend. 

Fibromyalgia was a stupid word, as far as Reggie was concerned. It was long, hard to spell, hard to say, and in no way conveyed anything about his situation asides the fact that it was impossible to understand and frustrating as all fuck. His dad just thought he should exercise, and his mom was uncomfortable with meds, and neither of them could be bothered to do the cursory google search that would inform them that fibromyalgia could easily be linked to childhood abuse of any kind, and that stressful situations - like hiding in the airing cupboard as they screamed at each other about whose fault it was that their son had essentially committed insurance fraud - only exacerbated the situation. It was his boys who got him, who helped him grow past the narcotics and the painkillers and the listless staring at the ceiling as the world spun on somewhere far away. 

It got better, slowly. Kayla turned out to be a raging lesbian, so her and Alex were still going strong, if you ignored the fact that her best friend, Carrie, and her brother, Willie came with them on every date and that they were more likely to high five than hug. 

Willie, it turned out, was totally fucking  _ awesome.  _ For starters, he was absolutely madly in love with Alex, which meant he had fantastic taste, and he didn’t fall for any of Alex’s defensive, witty bullshit; he was direct and sweet, and he was incredibly easy on the eyes. Secondly, the second he realised that Sunset Curve were basically Alex’s brothers, he took them under his wing too. He introduced Bobby to boxing to provide an outlet for his protective instincts and brimming anger at anything that dared look at his boys wrong, and coached Luke through having formative conversations with his parents, and held Reggie when he had days where he wanted to be held and comforted, but Alex was too bony and Bobby was too fussy and Luke vibrated with too much energy to possibly maintain a single position for half an hour. 

Unfortunately, Willie wasn’t didn’t just see through Alex, he took absolutely none of their bullshit. 

It was probably a good thing, the way he encouraged them to have important conversations with the power of raised eyebrows and by threatening to replace their shirts with the loudest and most clashing prints he could find in an LA thrift store, and sometimes just by slinging an arm around them and telling it would be okay, but it was kind of… inconvenient. 

Sure, it was awesome usually - Sunset Curve were as close as ever, and Alex had bought his first pink hoodie, and Bobby felt more comfortable being soft around them, and Luke sometimes missed band practice to have dinner with his parents, and Reggie had finally emailed all his teachers explaining that he had chronic pain which sometimes resulted in fibro fog so if they could please allow him to leave when necessary and not push for participation that would be great, thanks - but Reggie had been successfully hiding his very minor crush on Bobby from everyone in his life (except Alex) for the past three years, and if Willie kept gently ruffling his hair and asking what was up, he  _ was  _ going to crack. 

Cracking would be awful. Possibly cataclysmic. Bobby was Straight, and as awful as it would be if they went the Luke-and-Alex route of dating for approximately thirty seconds and being awkward for a whole year, having Bobby do that thing where he scrunched his nose up in confusion as he let Reggie down - gently, because Reggie was  _ delicate  _ and hurting his feelings could mean days of pain and honestly, why did they even put up with him when they had to step around so many eggshells? - and then acted awkward and uncomfortable around him  _ forever  _ was even worse. And then, Alex would probably take his side because he was sweet and wouldn’t agree with Bobby being weird just because Reggie had feelings for him because if Alex could overcome the panic he’d felt whenever he saw Luke for three months, then Bobby could get over himself, but Luke would be annoyed at Reggie for disrupting the balance of the band and then they’d split up before they’d even made it big. 

Reggie hissed quietly as his quiet panic over the possible apocalyptic outcome of Willie finding out about the one secret he’d kept from his hand started to bubble up under his collarbone. He’d been doing his best to concentrate in maths, he really had, but then he’d found himself absently humming the riff Bobby had been working on last night after Alex and Luke had gone home and it had been a quick dissolve into madness from there. 

“Are you alright, Reggie?” The girl he sat next to whispered. 

Julie was pretty cool. And pretty. Way more cool than pretty cool really - she was almost as awesome as Willie. She was quite possibly the kindest and most talented person on the planet - he’d seen her doing piano recitals in grade school, and she had a killer voice, if the times he’d walked past her music class last year was any indication, and he was pretty sure she was supposed to be in his music class this year, but her mom had died just before the start of term and he didn’t really blame her for not showing up to classes when she didn’t feel like it. 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He smiled at her, probably goofily. “What are we doing?” 

Julie laughed and tilted her chair to talk him through the problem on the board, making sure not to touch him anywhere, which was one of the main reasons he loved her. 

“I heard you guys have a gig tomorrow night, right?” She asked him once they’d finished going through it. 

“Hmm?” He waved her off when she opened her mouth to repeat herself as her words caught up to him. “Oh, yeah. It’s gonna be pretty awesome. It’s at the Three Clubs on Vine Street, you interested in coming?” 

She raised her eyebrow sceptically. “Do I look old enough to get into a club? Hell, you guys don’t look old enough to get into a club.”

“Julie, Julie, Julie.” he shook his head. “Haven’t you learned? Sunset Curve doesn’t pander to silly things like  _ age limits.  _ Luke does a mean angry voice for the phone, and we send Bobby’s friend from boxing in as our manager to talk to the staff, and then when we’re on stage the lighting isn’t good enough to notice.” 

“Colour me impressed,” Julie allowed, leaning back in her chair. “And I suppose you have some magical way of getting me into this club?” 

Reggie hummed softly. “How do you feel about being a roadie? Or our social media manager? We don’t have one of those. You could be makeup? I’ve always wanted to wear eyeliner to one of these gigs.” 

Julie grinned. “I would  _ love  _ to do your eyeliner, so I’ll be makeup. Can I bring Flynn? She can be your social media manager, for real, if you want.” 

“Woah,” Reggie breathed. “For realsies?”

“Well you’d have to ask her,” Julie acknowledged. “And she might say no, she’s a very busy lady. But she  _ can  _ be bribed with Instagram shoutouts and candy.” 

“You, Julie Molina, are my absolute favourite person in the whole entire world,” Reggie told her as they packed up. “I owe you my firstborn child, and my share of the proceedings of our first platinum hit.” 

“You do,” Julie agreed. “And I will raise your firstborn graciously and allow you visitation rights. And you will bring your band to the table in the corner by the stage at lunch so people think we’re cool and so you can ask Flynn. Done?” 

“Done.” Reggie shook her hand. “Remember to tuck your hair behind your ear as you smile at Luke, he thinks it’s cute!” He called behind him as he rushed out the door. 

——

**Same Day**

“So, squad.” Reggie tucked himself under Willie’s free arm as he caught up to them. “What would you say if I told you I got us a social media manager and a makeup artist for tomorrow’s gig?”

“That you’re my absolute favourite band member and if we could ditch these two losers and make it as a duo, I’d do it in a heartbeat,” Luke replied immediately. 

“Annnd what if I said it was Flynn and Julie?” He added, holding his bag up like a shield. 

“That you’re my absolute favourite band member and if we could ditch these two losers and make it as a duo, I’d do it in a heartbeat,” Bobby and Alex said in unison, high fiving each other without looking when they finished. 

“I’m simultaneously terrified of you and madly in love with you at the same time,” Willie told Alex fondly. 

“Reggie,” Luke stopped walking and crossed his arms sulkily. “I mean this with all the love in the fucking world, but I hate you so much.” 

“Luke,” Reggie mocked him fondly. “I mean this with all the love in the fucking world, but grow a pair and ask her out.” 

“Ohhhhhhh,” Alex, Bobby and Willie all cheered. 

“So, how did you book us a social media manager?” Luke started walking again, refusing to look at him. 

Reggie followed him, reaching forward to grab Luke’s hand just in case he really was mad. “I asked Julie if she wanted to come tomorrow and said that she could either pose as makeup or social media, and she said she wanted to do makeup to give me eyeliner and then asked if Flynn could come and that she’d do our social media for real.” 

Luke squeezed his hand, like he always did when he was playing mad but wasn’t really. “Awesome, Reg, thanks. Good work, I guess I can repay you with pudding?” 

“Of course.” Reggie nodded solemnly. Pudding was as good as real money, and they had a barter system with its rules laid out next to the Acceptable Reasons For Missing Rehearsal list. 

“You’ll look hot with eyeliner.” Bobby nudged his shoulder. “The ladies’ll be all over you.” 

Reggie spluttered and turned red, glancing to Alex helplessly. 

Alex, bless his heart, stepped in. “Are you sure that’s what you want, Bobby? Competition?” 

“It makes for a little fun, ‘Lex.” Bobby grinned back at Alex, thankfully not noticing Reggie’s dilemma. “Usually I don’t get any ‘cause Luke just makes heart eyes at his text convo with Julie and Reg makes heart eyes at the free snacks, and you’re our prettiest band member but you got swept up by Mr Biceps-Bigger-Than-My-Head over here. I reckon our Reg’ll get mobbed if he wears eyeliner and I’m looking forward to the challenge.” 

Luckily, before Reggie could do anything embarrassing, like admit out loud that he’d take an appreciative glance from Bobby over being mobbed by fans, Julie stood up and waved them over, and all attention switched to Luke, who was frantically making sure his hair was swoopy enough and that his arms were fully on display. 

“Dude,” Alex drawled, clearly unimpressed, despite how easily Willie could fluster him. “Just ask her out!”

“What would you know about girls?” Luke snapped, clearly meaning nothing by it.

“I mean, who out of the five of us has maintained a healthy relationship with a girl for a year?” 

“Pop quiz!” Bobby yelled before Luke could complain. They’d started the pop quizzes the night Alex had driven Reggie to hospital and settled on dating Kayla to make his parents happy. The aim of it was to make sure Alex knew enough about her to satisfy his parents that he wasn’t lying, but it had kind of derailed, and now it was just a test of how in tune Alex was with Kayla and Carrie, his two closest friends outside of Sunset Curve. 

“Where’s she sat?” Reggie went first, as always. It sounded like an obvious one, but getting used to it had trained Alex out of staring at Willie like a lovesick fool as soon as he walked into a room. 

“Table by the central window, immediately to the right of the head of the table closest to us,” Alex fired back. 

“What’s she wearing?” Bobby asked next. 

“The purple hoodie I got her for Christmas, ripped black skinny jeans, and purple vans.” 

“What lesson did she just have?” 

“Chemistry, she hates chemistry because she’s dyslexic and the chemical symbols and formulae don’t always follow the same rules. And-“ Alex pointed at Luke, anticipating his question. “She’s got AP history next, her favourite subject because it’s the only one she has with Carrie, and they’re covering the Boston Tea Party.” 

The three of them cheered, and Willie obliging released Alex so they could slap him on the back and fist bump him before reeling him back in. 

“What,” Julie asked, hands on her hips, “the  _ fuck _ was that?” 

Luke choked on air and looked between her and the guys frantically. “Uh, we were making sure Alex knows how his girlfriend is doing.” 

“His girlfriend?” Flynn raised an eyebrow, motioning to Alex, who had grabbed a chair and sat down, throwing his legs over Willie’s lap. 

Alex hummed and nodded. “His sister.” He tapped Willie’s thigh. “She’s dating Carrie.” 

“Okay.” Flynn shrugged. “Y’all can be weird. That’s okay. What can we do for you?” 

Reggie waved at her and snagged the seat next to Alex, just beating Luke to it. “We would like you to be our social media manager. We’ll pay you in shoutouts, candy, concert tickets, and like, when we become famous we’ll actually pay you.” 

Bobby took the seat in between Flynn and Willie, leaving Luke to sit next to Julie. “You can do whatever you like, boss us about, make us do… what are those videos called? Tiktoks? Them. Go wild.” 

Flynn rubbed her hands together evilly. “Oh, you are so going to regret that, boys.” 

“We do have some requests, though,” Alex said, sharing a slightly panicked look with Reggie. “We’re in the process of getting the Orpheum-”

“ _ What?”  _ Julie and Flynn asked at the same time, leaning forward. 

“Oh, hey!” Reggie grinned. “You guys do the thing too!” 

“We’re close,” Alex continued, “and after that, things will take off. It’s the Orpheum. Bands don’t play there and then just  _ not  _ get big. So, I’m going to come out to my parents beforehand, and I want it to be explicit in your post thingies that I’m gay.” 

Reggie’s smile dropped. “Alex…” 

“If it goes really badly, I’ll just join you in Bobby’s garage.” He shrugged. “But I don’t want to have some weird coming out after six years and have some media backlash about how I’ve been lying or whatever. Plus, I’m sick of sneaking out at three am to go on dates.” 

“No you’re not,” Luke teased, though his expression made it clear he had no idea what to say. 

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m not. But I  _ would  _ like to be able to catch a movie without my boyfriend’s sister. Kayla is awesome, but it’s a  _ little  _ awkward.” He held his fingers an inch apart. 

“And what about Kayla?” Bobby asked. “I mean, I’m all for this, man, obviously, I’m so fucking proud of you, but is she okay with it?” 

Alex nodded. “We talked about this. The expiration date was always gonna be the Orpheum. We’ve been doing favours and back road clubs since we were fourteen, and the goal has always been the Orpheum. She doesn’t wanna be in the limelight, I don’t want to lie.” 

“Also,” Reggie squeezed Alex’s shoulder gently then turned to Flynn, “I am  _ incredibly  _ bi. So bi-”

“Literally none of us are straight,” Luke interrupted. “And we just don’t want that to be something that we cash in on  _ or  _ avoid. Just like, a background thing. Alex has anxiety, Reggie has chronic pain, all of us would jump Henry Cavil if given half a chance and explicit consent.” 

Bobby leaned across the table to fist bump him, leaving Reggie an absolute mess. He’d been pretty sure that Bobby was straight since literally always. Bobby liked girls. Bobby  _ loved  _ girls. Bobby had never mentioned liking guys, not even casually, like Luke tended to. A seed of doubt lodged itself into his sternum. Luke seemed to know. Alex didn’t look surprised. Why hadn’t Bobby told him? 

He laughed awkwardly. “Yeah. So. Um, obviously we’re treating this like we’re super famous which we’re not, but if it was gonna happen, the Orpheum will be when it does and we just want all cards on the table.” 

Julie frowned at him and nodded towards the door, as if to say  _ do you need a minute _ ? Willie leaned round Alex to touch his shoulder gently. He shook his head at both of them. This was fine. The world was round. His ribs felt like they were being snapped individually. They had a gig tomorrow. Bobby liked guys. 

“Sounds good, boys.” Flynn nodded, grinning at them. “It’s smart to have a plan for that kind of thing even though you’re not super huge yet. You’re planning ahead. You’ll have an Instagram by tonight, and you can pay me in pudding cups.” 

“Done.” Luke nodded immediately and shook her hand. “Welcome to Sunset Curve, ladies.” He cleared his throat, grinning. “We have Bobby, our very angry rhythm guitarist, he’s very sweet deep down but usually he’s overwhelmed by the urge to fight Alex and Reggie’s parents, so it’s hard to see. Moving to the right we have Willie, who does show photography as and when Alex bribes him, we do not know the details of those bribes nor do we want to. He’s the only one of us who can string multiple rational thoughts together, but he does lose that ability whenever Alex smiles at him. Then we have Alex himself, our drummer. He’s very gay, all the time. Ask him what he’s thinking about? Willie’s arms, always, which is an understandable sentiment but honestly not very helpful when I’m trying to write a song. Once committed insurance fraud. Then we have Reggie, our bassist. We would all kill for Reggie, no hesitation, no questions asked. He’s a little delicate but he makes up for it by being a cuddle monster and always having a hot water bottle, so if you can’t find him, he’s probably at the centre of a pile-on, radiating warmth. Also committed insurance fraud.” 

“And then, sat next to Julie,” Bobby took over, “is Luke, our lead singer slash songwriter slash guitarist. None of us like him very much but we do love him a lot so we kind of put up with him. He’s made out with all three of us at least once because he’s a mess.” 

Alex pulled a face. “I don’t think it counted as making out any of those times, unless you two have been getting it on together since. He basically attempted to cave my jaw in on New Years when we were thirteen, serenaded Reggie and got so into it he kissed him, and then walked in and kissed you halfway through last year because he didn’t want you to feel left out.” 

“Nah, babe,” Willie said, “Luke made out with Bobby  _ and  _ Reggie the night we all got really drunk in Bobby’s garage when you realised you were basically sure to get the Orpheum in a couple months, you were just watching turtle videos by that point.” 

“Huh… okay.” Alex leaned back in his chair, thinking face on. After a moment he seemed to let whatever he was considering go, because he turned to Luke and Julie. “He’s very affectionate but you get used to it after like three days.” 

“He’s lying,” Willie stage whispered. “They’re  _ all  _ very affectionate.” 

Reggie smiled conspiratorially at the girls. “Luke cries at the Titanic. And Frozen.” 

“Bobby cried at Marley and me!” Luke protested. “And Alex cried at every episode of Say I Do.”

“Reggie cries at Moana,” Bobby said, just as Alex started complaining that they had  _ all  _ cried at Say I Do. 

“Moana is cry worthy, and you’re all just heartless,” Reggie insisted, despite the fact that this was possibly the seventh time they’d had this conversation. 

Across the table, Julie turned to Flynn with a hopeful smile. “Maybe they’ll calm down?” 

——

**Junior Year (17)**  


The main reason that Alex was Reggie’s favourite person at nearly any given moment was that he  _ got it _ . 

A lot of the things that triggered Alex’s anxiety were also pretty damn likely to start one of Reggie’s flares, and as much as they loved their bandmates and the others, sometimes there was nothing quite as claustrophobic as the people who loved you. 

It didn’t happen often, not with such awesome people around them all the time making sure they were comfortable and okay, but in the final two week sprint to the gig at the Orpheum that they 10000% owed to Flynn’s incredible success with social media and Willie’s awesome photography, things were starting to become scary real, so chilling on the roof, a foot apart, touch averse and panicking, was beginning to become something of a habit for them. 

“I think I’m gonna start moving my stuff into the garage,” Alex said, hands trembling where they were rested on his thighs. “I mean, they’re not gonna take it well, are they? Yesterday we walked past two girls holding hands and I swear, man, they almost lost it.” 

“‘Lex, you don’t gotta tell them if you’re not ready. You’re still a dependent no one will be mad if you leave it until you’re out of there.” Reggie laid flat on his back, readjusting the hot water bottle he’d brought up with him. “We’d prefer it if you were safe.”

Alex exhaled shakily. “I want to ask Willie to homecoming, though, Reg. I want to post stupid sappy romantic pictures without worrying that it’ll get back to them, and I don’t want to keep pushing him away when they walk into a room, and I want to do some ridiculously extra promposal with a song and flowers and whatever the fuck else. I could stay here, with you, and Bobby, and Luke on the bad nights, and I could have all of that. I’m gonna lose them eventually, why would I let them steal every quintessential teenage experience from me just to have another year trapped in a house with the passive aggressiveness and the expectations and the dread of knowing they’re gonna find out?” 

“If that’s what you wanna do, bro, we’ll support you. A hundred percent, you know that.” Reggie offered his pinky finger. It had become a way for them to reassure each other without any of the touching that might hurt Reggie or make Alex’s skin crawl when they were having bad days. 

Alex linked their pinkies together. “Yeah. I know. I really love him, y’know that?” 

Reggie laughed weakly, wincing at the way it pushed his shoulders against the tiles. “Yeah. I know. He really loves you too. I better be your best man, though.” 

“I don’t know, Reg. Willie’s basically adopted you as his little brother, he might get to you before I do,” Alex teased. “and Bobby, our poor single mother who’s been desperately trying to raise three idiots ever since we crashed into him trying to sneak into the music building, can walk me down the aisle. Or Mr Molina, if he wants to.”

“Why didn’t you tell me he’s not straight?” Reggie asked suddenly, unsure of why he’d remembered it now and unable to stop himself asking. “I mean. I know you don’t believe in outing people and stuff and obviously I respect that but… I thought the four of us told each other everything, and I’m the only one who didn’t know.” 

“I didn’t know for certain,” Alex promised. “I assume Luke knows because he’s the one Bobby made out with. I suspected, but only because he looked absolutely dumbstruck the first few times I brought Willie to practice. Which, an understandable reaction, he’s a very good looking guy, but he hadn’t said anything to me.” 

“D’you think he knows? And that’s why he didn’t say anything?” 

“Reg, this is Bobby. He’d come out and say it if he knew. Besides, he flirts with you like, all the time. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t do that if he thought you liked him.” 

“True.” Reggie shifted slightly as a tile started to dig into his shoulder blade. “You’re not shaking anymore, feel better?” 

Alex nodded. “I’m just gonna start moving my stuff out. It’s…” he exhaled slowly, laughing slightly hysterically. “I’m fucking terrified, but I’ve gotta do it eventually, right?” 

Reggie held an arm out, so Alex could curl up to him if he wanted. “We are  _ so  _ proud of you, dude. And we’ll be proud of you if you decide to tough it out until graduation next year, and we’ll be proud of we have to sneak into your house to move your shit out for you. Okay?” 

Alex laid down next to him, though didn’t quite touch him. “Okay,” he whispered. “Can we stay up here for a bit longer?” 

“‘Course, man.” 

——  
**Same Night**  


“Reg.” Alex’s voice was crackly over the phone, but Reggie was pretty sure he was crying.

“Yeah, what is it? You okay?” 

“So. Um. Remember how you said you’d be proud of me even if you had to sneak into my house and steal my shit for me?” 

Reggie’s heart sunk, and an ache started to build under his rib cage. “Yeah, ‘course. You still got your car?” 

Alex laughed wetly. “Yeah. I’ve got everything I could pack in ten minutes. Drums are in the garage. I’ll be fine if we can’t get back in to get anything. But. Um. I could use a hand.” 

“I’m at Julie’s, me and Carlos had a video game tournament. Do you want me to bring Ray and Julie?” 

“Um. If they’re okay with that?” Alex cleared his throat. “Make sure they don’t feel obliged though, I don’t wanna inconvenience them just because I was an idiot.” 

“Hey, hey, hey,” Reggie shushed him. “Tell me what happened?” He started stumbling round in the dark, swearing under his breath as he caught the corner of the door on his shoulder.

“S-So, I was just. Flynn made me a rainbow sunset curve shirt, I think she’s made one for each of us with all the different flags-”

“Flynn’s an angel,” Reggie agreed, knocking on Ray’s door.

“Okay, and I guess I forgot to.. to take it off? And when I got home, they started pressing me about it, and Kayla, and I guess it just, it just came out?” Alex’s voice cracked as he finished talking, and Reggie was pretty sure he heard him choke back a sob. 

“Okay, you’re okay, I’ll be one minute, ‘Lex.” He poked his head into Ray’s room. Ray had sort of taken the four of them on after he’d visited rehearsal one time looking for Julie and ended up asking about their parents. Upon hearing that Bobby’s parents were almost never home, Reggie basically lived in the studio, Alex was planning on it and Luke was in the process of attempting to mend what had been a pretty rocky relationship, he started making an effort to invite them round for dinner, and to help Willie with filming shows for YouTube, and arranging chaperones so their gigs were slightly more legal. He was quite possibly the only adult Reggie had ever truly trusted. “Ray?” 

“Wha’ ‘s’t?” Ray slurred, turning on a light. “You need a lift?”

“Ray, it’s Alex.”

Within seconds, Ray was wide awake and hustling him downstairs, grabbing Julie and the car keys. “Do I need to pick Luke and Bobby up on the way, mijo?” 

“That would be awesome, thanks.” 

——

**Junior Year (17)**

Playing the Orpheum was the coolest thing Reggie had ever done, including the time he’d done a backflip. 

It was everything they’d thought it would be - burning stage lights, electric tension, Reggie and Luke sharing a mic so close rumours would almost certainly get started, Alex strong and steady throughout, drawing cheers out of the crowd when any of them sang a little bit, making eye contact with Bobby during riffs, a cheering audience - and more - Bobby’s hand in his as they took their final vow, a feeling of  _ rightrightright _ so overwhelmingly strong that it felt like a flare but also it didn’t hurt at all, like his chest was about to burst with happiness, nailing every note and knowing it, watching the audience come alive and realising that  _ this  _ was the moment they’d been dreaming about and it was real and incredible and tangible enough to taste. 

The days after were the same: fleeting moments where Bobby’s gaze would linger too long or where his tone was just a little off that would spend Reggie spiralling for hours until Luke pulled him down; an unprecedented increase in followers and gig offers; and a consistent happiness that quelled every other possible worry. 

——

**Senior year (18)**

The band started properly taking off after that. By the time spring of Senior Year rolled around, they’d gained a proper, decent sized following. Julie and Luke had finally gotten over themselves and gotten together, and a picture of Alex kissing Willie backstage like his life depended on it after a show, hair sweaty, drumsticks in one hand, the other twisted in Willie’s hair went so viral that Flynn had asked the five of them to do a live interview on Instagram talking about band life and themselves with PinkNew

“Hi, boys, I’m Jen, it’s lovely to meet you all!” The lady interviewing them had the most awesome hair Reggie had ever seen, all curly and short and spiked up. 

The five of them all waved and said hi, Alex half on top of Willie and Bobby’s arm around Reggie, tapping a comforting beat onto his shoulder. 

“So, first of all, I just wanted to congratulate you all on your recent success at the Orpheum! People are  _ loving  _ you guys. How does that feel for you?” 

Luke spoke up. “It’s… on the one hand it’s kind of terrifying, because we’re just these four boys from LA who’ve been jamming out together in Bobby’s garage since we had enough strength to hold instruments, but on the other hand? It’s everything we’ve been working for, and it’s amazing.” 

Jen nodded in understanding. “Now before we get into the questions I have prepared, I notice that you’ve brought an extra person along with you, can we assume this is Alex’s boyfriend?” 

Willie waved cheerfully, and Alex nodded, grinning down at him. “This is Willie, we’ve been together since halfway through Sophomore year. He takes most of the really cool shots Flynn puts on the band’s Instagram.” 

“You two are  _ adorable,”  _ Jen told them, then turned her focus to the rest of them. “So will we be meeting any other significant others? Boys? Girls?” 

Bobby took this one. “Well, Luke’s girlfriend does our makeup. Which is basically just Reggie’s eyeliner but sometimes the rest of us dabble. She’s also an incredibly talented singer and we’ve got a song or two with her planned for a future gig. Reg and I are both single.” 

Reggie threw up a peace sign. “We both swing both ways, though, so anybody is welcome to hit us up.” He winced slightly as Bobby’s grip on his shoulder tightened momentarily. 

Luke snorted. “No one in our band or in our backstage team is straight. It wasn’t intentional, but here we are, I guess.” 

Jen laughed. “Well, it’s lovely to see that younger rock fans can have some queer idols to look up to.” 

Luke nodded enthusiastically. “That’s a really big thing for us. None of us have had it that easy getting to where we are, and that’s part of why we want to make it big. To prove to every other kid with a dysfunctional family or chronic pain or homophobic parents or anxiety: you’ve got this.” 

Jen smiled softly. “That’s really beautiful, Luke. What can you tell us about the team’s experiences with chronic pain and anxiety?” 

Reggie waved. “Uh, I have fibromyalgia, which basically means I’m super pressure sensitive and I get these flares when I’m stressed, and this thing called fibro fog, or cognitive dysfunction, where I can’t really think when it hits.”

“And I have anxiety,” Alex added. “Which meant that Reg’s first flare was a bit of a disaster,” he joked. 

Bobby laughed at Jen’s confused face. “Reggie called ‘Lex in the middle of the night and told him he thought he was dying, so ‘Lex snuck out, called me and Luke to meet them at the hospital, half having a panic attack himself, and then Reg was put on some pretty strong medication and the whole time he was on It ‘Lex basically didn’t sleep because he was panicking.” 

Alex just nodded. “Yeah, basically. It’s a pretty hard line to walk, y’know? Like, it’s probably really hard for the guys to deal with us both at the same time if we’re having issues, but these boys are incredible, and Reg and I have pretty similar triggers, so usually we sort stuff out together.” 

“It sounds like the four of you are really close,” Jen said. “What about you, Willie, did you join this unit later? Was it hard meshing with them?” 

Willie tilted his hand back and forth. “So I kind of knew the guys from grade school, but once Alex and I started dating I properly became friends with them. It was definitely kinda daunting at first,” he laughed, “but they’re such good people, and they’re so funny, even if they’re not the most sensible at all times, so they really made a space for me.” 

Jen nodded. “They do sound like great boys. Can we expect any future news about your music?” 

Luke grinned excitedly. “So our manager, Flynn, is currently going over the two record deals we’ve been offered with Julie’s dad, so we can definitely go with the best one, but we’ve already planned the album, if all goes as we hope it will.” 

“And will some of these songs feature Julie, like Bobby said?” 

“That is currently the plan.” Luke nodded. “You should check her out on youtube by the way, the link is in my bio on Instagram to the boyfriend challenge thing I did with her. Julie is so so talented.” 

Jen laughed. “It’s good to see you’ve found a good match, then. Now we don’t have much longer, but can you give us an idea of how long we’ll have to wait to hear about this record deal?” 

Alex shrugged. “Once we pick a label, we’ll probably be looking at about six months to record an album, so you’ll probably be hearing about it in the next seven months or so?” 

“Well, I, for one, can’t wait.” She promised. “I have to let you go now, boys, but I look forward to your new music! Thank you so much for speaking to me.”

——

**7 Months Later (18)**

Reggie was pretty sure his heart was about to jackhammer it’s way out of his chest. 

They’d gotten a text from their manager at the record label they’d finally picked after hours of deliberation, saying that the album was ready for them to listen to. 

They’d grabbed each other, cheering and yelling and laughing with absolutely maniacal delight before piling into Alex’s car and calling Julie, Flynn and Willie to meet them again. 

Now, crammed together on a leather sofa in their manager’s office listening to the final notes of  _ their album _ , Reggie was pretty sure he was just going to explode. 

A hand grabbed the back of his neck, gently, as everyone always was with him, and suddenly he was face to face with Bobby, inches apart, as the world slowed down. 

Pressure started building in his sternum as uncertainty kicked in, but he let Bobby kiss him anyways, leant into it even, pretended it meant everything he wanted it to mean as Bobby cupped his jaw, mindful as always of how even the most ordinary things could hurt, grabbed his hand, pulled away, grinning. “We’re gonna be legends, Reg.” 

“Oh my god, fucking finally.” Alex’s voice cut through the haze swirling around in Reggie’s brain. 

“What?” The two of them turned to face him, Bobby keeping a hold of Reggie’s hand when he tried to pull away. 

Alex raised his eyebrow at the two of them, pulling Willie closer to him. “The both of you have been yammering in my ear about each other since junior year. Just because I scored this,” he waved his hand around Willie’s face, “doesn’t mean I have any idea how I did it, why would you come to me for advice?”

Willie snorted. “Yeah, didn’t you know that I did all of the work in making this happen?”

Luke raised his hand. “I did, that’s why I came to you for advice when I wanted to ask Julie out.” He bumped his knuckles against Willie’s. 

Their manager cleared her throat. “Uh… boys… as happy as I am for you that all that unresolved tension has finally been sorted, I need to know how we’re feeling?” 

“Incredible,” Luke said immediately. “I love it. I’m so happy with it.”

The rest of them agreed quickly, and she nodded. “Have you had any thoughts about the cover design?”

Julie raised her hand. “Um, actually I drew a cover? Everybody’s said they’re okay with it so..” 

As they started discussing how the album cover would look and if the design was okay, Reggie turned his attention back to Bobby. 

“Uh, man. Can.. can we talk?” He asked quietly. “Because, um. Like. We’ve got ten minutes before the panic kicks in and then it’s a highway to flare town.” 

“Yeah, shit. Of course.” Bobby stood up, still not letting go of his hand. “Guys, we’re gonna go have a healthy conversation like normal, healthy people, which, as you know, we are. So…” he pointed at the door, then dragged Reggie out to cheers and wolf whistles.

“Okay,” Bobby started once they’d found an alcove with stools to talk. “So, I just wanna like, be clear with you? Because Alex kind of mentioned that you were upset that I didn’t mention the whole not being straight thing so I just wanted to apologise for that first? I didn’t mean to keep you out of the loop I’ve just had a crazy big crush on you for like, ever, and I didn’t want to come across as experimenting? Or anything. So… yeah.” 

“Oh.” Reggie blinked. “No, that’s fine. It’s old news, I get it. Alex seems to think Willie was your bi crisis though so maybe clear that one up with him?” 

“No, no.” Bobby laughed and grabbed his hand. “Willie was  _ definitely  _ my bi crisis. Before that I just figured I was straight-bar-Reggie.”

Reggie felt his cheeks burn, and the ache in his chest ease a little. “Okay, um. So… you kissed me… romantically?” 

Bobby raised an eyebrow. “Yes, Reg. Did you think that was just a fun bro-kiss because if so I’ve massively misinterpreted this situation.”

“I thought it was on your side? I was into it,” Reggie reassured him. “I just didn’t know that you were?” 

“I was,” Bobby confirmed. “So, is there anything else I need to say to assuage this panic of yours, or can we table this for later and go back and celebrate our totally awesome album?” 

“We can go back.” Reggie nodded. “Um. We could maybe. Uh. Try it again, though?” He drummed his fingers against his thigh, ignoring the bruised feeling. “Now that we’re both clear that it’s in a totally romantic way not a bro thing.” 

“‘Course, Reg.”

——

**Three Years Later** **(21)**

Being famous was kind of… exhausting. 

Reggie loved some parts. His home was on the stage with his boys and their songs and crowds of thousands of cheering fans singing along, and in the tour bus with Reggie and Julie and Flynn, and curled up on Ray’s sofa playing video games with Carlos, and none of that changed just because their audiences got bigger. He loved watching Alex explore dancing with Carrie, who was still best friends with Kayla, although they’d broken up mutually three years after leaving school; and watching Julie’s career absolutely skyrocket after they did a kind of McBusted situation and produced a full album with her singing and songwriting, and toured it; loved watching Luke fully grow into himself as both a person and an artist, into a confident and talented adult instead of a restless and over ambition teenager. Mostly, he loved watching Bobby, but he was pretty sure Flynn would slap him upside the head and fondly call him a sap for that, because there wasn’t anything specific, it was everything. 

There were, as with everything, downsides. 

The constant attention was one of the biggest pitfalls for Reggie and Alex, and one or two times they’d had near misses with having to cancel shows because they’d gotten mobbed in supermarkets or car parks, triggering attacks that had taken a lot of work to speedily recover from. 

Reggie also wasn’t personally a fan of being followed on dates and hangouts, and he knew the team shared that opinion. They’d eventually decided to go all in on a place together, knowing that they meshed well enough for it from their years of couch surfing between the Molina residence and Bobby’s garage, and whilst it was awesome… well, living with his six closest friends meant that in-house date nights were kind of not a thing, and getting caught in a maccies in Alex’s hoodie, Willie’s joggers and Flynn’s bucket hat at three am with Bobby looking just as disheveled asides from the suspenders he’d for some reason clipped on as they were leaving was not really Reggie’s idea of a good time, as utterly hilarious as it had proved to be afterwards. 

At the end of the day, though, Reggie went home to his best friends in the whole world, and they played stupid drinking games and hate-watched shitty tv shows and obsessed over equally shitty tv shows that spoke to them, and Alex yelled at them weekly until they got into a habit of cleaning up after themselves, and they bought rubber door stoppers for the doors and cupboards after the first time Reggie had flinched so hard he’d dropped something, and every night he crawled into bed with Bobby who sang him absolutely awful ad-libbed nursery rhymes and woke up him by tickling him, and it was everything he’d ever wanted. 

——

**Four years later (26)**

“Babe. Babe. Babe, wake up,” Reggie shook Bobby awake. “Bobbyyyy.” 

Bobby groaned and rolled over. “Reg you’ve got thirty seconds to give me a good reason to wake me up whilst it’s still dark before I refuse to make you coffee for a week.”

“Firstly, Alex would bully you into it because you make his coffee when you do mine, two, my ribs hurt and I can’t find any ibuprofen, three… uh. I love you?” 

“You are so lucky you play bass,” Bobby told him jokingly, even as he got up. It had started as something spur of the moment Luke had said, and somehow it had kind of become the band’s thing. One time Reggie had walked in on Alex and Luke telling their cat that she was so lucky Instagram loved her at the exact same time. “Did you check Juke’s room? Doesn’t Julie keep some on hand for migraines?” 

“I don’t wanna move.” He stared balefully up at Bobby. “And please stop trying to make the ship names catch on. It’s never gonna be a thing.”

“They’ve already caught on with the fans,” Bobby countered, hopping around as he tugged joggers on. “And you refer to Willie and Alex as Willex literally all the time. Even when you’re speaking  _ to  _ the two of them.”

“That’s because they’re one person, god, keep up.” Reggie starfished, humming softly.

“ _ You  _ and Alex are one person, Reginald. I’m gonna go scour the house for painkillers and when I get back Alex is gonna be in my space, isn’t he?” 

Reggie pulled a face. “Okay, so he might show up, but, there will still be space for you. And Luke, if you wanna bring him back with you.”

Bobby rolled his eyes, but still bobbed down to kiss Reggie’s forehead before he left. 

As predicted, Alex waltzed in not two seconds later and laid down next to Reggie, resting his chin in his hands. “So. All I’m saying is that I started dating Willie first, so I should get first proposal rights,  _ and  _ I should get first-one-to-ask-Ray rights.” 

Reggie ‘tch’ed. “Ray called  _ me  _ mijo first, though. So whilst I’m willing to relinquish proposal rights, because you did get together first and you’re more romance-y, I want Ray rights.” 

“That is true,” Alex relented. “Okay, fine. Who gets to ask Luke to be on of the best men first?” 

“You, but only because Bobby bet me Luke-as-best-man rights that I couldn’t watch Moana without crying  _ once,  _ and I lost.” 

“Fool,” Alex told him fondly. 

“Fool,” Reggie mimicked, then groaned as the crease of his t shirt dug into his ribs. 

“When will you learn-”

“When will you learn, that your actions have consequences?” Luke cut him off as he threw himself onto the bed, narrowly missing landing on Reggie. “Bobbers is getting you a hot water, Reginald.” 

“I love one man,” Reggie informed them, shoving at Luke until he could sprawl half on top of him. “And it is neither of you.”

“Anyways,” Luke’s tone was suddenly serious. “If I said I was thinking of proposing to Julie, what would you say?” 

“That you’re third in line,” Alex responded, not missing a beat. “Me, then Reg, then you. Other than that? Super stoked for you, man.” 

Reggie nodded. “That’s awesome!” 

Luke blinked. “You’ve been planning this and didn’t tell me?” 

“Not planning it,” Reggie reassured him quickly. “We were just fighting over who got to ask you to be best man first, and who got to ask Ray to walk us down the aisle first.” 

“Oh. That’s.. okay, I guess.” Luke’s eyes went shiny. 

“I won,” Alex piped up. “So, do you wanna be my best man, bro?” 

“Yeah, ‘course I do, ‘Lex. You guys and Bobbers are gonna be mine, right?” 

“We’re gonna be what?” Bobby asked from the doorway. He handed Reggie a hot water bottle and a glass of water then wormed his way in between him and Alex. “Why is Luke crying?” 

“I’m gonna propose to Julie. After Alex proposes to Willie, obviously he gets seniority. But I want you three to be my best men.” 

“Aw, man.” Bobby grinned. “I’d love that.” 

——

**Ten years later (35)**

“Hi, boys, it’s lovely to see you again!” Jen shook their hands and directed them to seats. “‘Man, you guys have grown since that interview when you were what, 18?” 

Reggie laughed and laced his fingers with Bobby. “It’s been a long time.” 

“So, five albums, four tours, three weddings, two cats, and one awesome house later, how are you all doing?” 

“Really good,” Alex replied. “Really fucking good. Aw wait, shit, I can’t swear, can I?” 

Jen laughed. “We’ll censor you, don’t worry. So, let’s go in that order, huh? Five albums, how are we feeling? Will there be more?”

Luke spoke first. “I think we’ve got one or two more in us, but we’re not going to be pushing it too far. This has been our whole life since we were fourteen. When we stop having things to write about, we’ll stop writing. Go live something else.” 

“But still together,” Reggie added. “I’m far too used to living with these lot to make it by myself.” 

Bobby pointed at him. “None of us would make it out of the door without Willie and Flynn. They’re the only ones that doesn’t need a gallon of coffee to function.” 

“But we love what we have,” Alex finished. “It’s like snapshots of our life, y’know? I like playing them in order, from the angst and ambition of the first album to the utter contentment of the fifth. The last three songs of the album were actually our wedding songs.” 

“Bet you didn’t know that.” Luke grinned. 

Jen ‘ooh’ed. “I certainly didn’t. That does explain why they make me cry every time. They’re beautiful songs.” 

Luke held his hands out and the three obligingly high fived him. 

“So,” Jen laughed, “four tours. Amazing tours, if my sources are correct.”

“Jen,” Reggie gasped, clutching his chest. “We sent you tickets to all of them, you didn’t come?” 

“I came to two,” she allowed. “I couldn’t make the other two. They were incredible. Do you guys enjoy them? You always look to be having a hell of a time.” 

“Absolutely.” Bobby nodded. “That’s how we always wanted this to be, y’know? Sure the other stuff is nice, we’re so so grateful for everything we’ve got and how lucky we’ve been, but at the end of the day, the goal was a stage, a couple thousand people, our music, and us. Tour is where we’re most us. There’s none of the anxiety or pressure of everyday life. It’s just Luke’s lyrics, Alex’s beat, and me and Reggie trying out best to keep up with them.” 

“Plus, we’re super lucky with our family. Willie does our photography if he’s not got anything else going on, which he often does, modelling, photography, Alex is a very lucky man,” Luke teased, “ and Flynn is at every single one, making sure none of us fall to pieces like the absolute legend she is. And obviously, Julie, light and love of my life, understands tour life completely, and she’s happy to come when she can.” 

“And,” Jen grinned, “speaking of weddings. Julie looked incredible, didn’t she?” 

“Luke cried,” Alex informed her smugly, “within three seconds. It was totally deserved though, she did look absolutely amazing.”

“You cried at your wedding Alexander. And mine, and Reg and Bobby’s,” Luke fired back before turning back to Jen. “There was this moment, when I first saw her, and my heart genuinely stopped, and I turned to Reggie and I was like dude seriously I think I’m dying.” 

“And Reggie, who considers Julie to be his little sister, was already in floods of tears,” Bobby continued. “And he just elbows Luke and goes “bro I swear to god, if you die, Julie will cry sad tears, and if Julie cries sad tears at her wedding I’ll resurrect you just so I can kill you, now get it together and marry the girl of your dreams.”” 

“So I did.” Luke held up his left hand to show of his wedding band. 

Jen pressed her hand to her heart. “I’m not crying until I’ve quizzed all four of you, so shush, you.” She turned her focus to Alex. “Now, Alex. Yours was the only wedding with any media presence, is there a reason for that?” 

Alex’s smile dropped a little, but he nodded. “I want my parents, some day, to google me, and I want them to see me on the happiest day of my life, marrying my husband in a church, and know that they have a place in my life if they want it, but I’ve made it this far on my own, and I can keep going.” 

Jen coughed, eyes going shiny. “God, the things you boys do to me. Even if they’re not proud of you, every single fan you have is. How was the day?” 

Alex melted back into the sofa, eyes going soft. “It was perfect. I think we’ve had this conversation before over tequila and the phone,” he paused to allow Jen to laugh wetly, “gay kids don’t always get to grow up imagining their wedding, but I did. My folks didn’t really talk to me about it until way after I’d realised, and then I met Willie, when I was fifteen, and I called my big sister at four thirty in the morning, and I just blurted out, I’m gay, and I think I’ve met the boy I want to marry. And… well… I did it, and it was everything I’ve ever wanted it to be.” 

“He did, I was there,” Luke agreed, eyes also glassy. “I just remember being so fucking proud of him, because we dated for like five minutes when we were thirteen, and the whole thing was so hush hush. And then I went to get more Jaffa cakes, and I came back up and he was talking to his sister about his friend from dance’s foster brother.” 

“How did you get together?” Jen pressed, leaning forwards, tear rolling down her cheek. “I don’t think we’ve heard this one?” 

“Oh!” Reggie raised his hand. “I star in this one, can I tell it?” 

Alex let out a strangled laugh and nodded. “Go for it, buddy.”

Reggie grinned. “So I got my first flare ever when I was fifteen, and I called Alex at two am, and I was just like bro I’m dying, I think I need to go to the hospital. So he agrees to drive me, and decides he’s gonna ask out the girl from dance to make it up to his parents. And I’m just like, bro, you don’t like girls? And he’s like oh yeah, but her brother’s cute and we made out behind the locker room.” 

Alex groaned and hid his head in his hands. 

“And then over the next two months, Alex and Kayla go on loads of dates, except Carrie, - Kayla’s best friend and the lead singer of Dirty Candy who Alex dances with sometimes - and Willie go with them every time. And then Alex shows up to band practice with this six foot two absolutely gorgeous hulk of a guy, and the three of us are just like Alex, who on god's green earth is that?” 

Bobby waved at the camera. “Thanks for the bi crisis, Willie.” 

Jen snorted, but waved for Reggie to continue. 

“So after a couple of weeks of that, we decided that there’s no way Alex is just casually hanging out with a guy  _ that  _ gorgeous, who he’s kissed, without doing anything about it. Except Alex is a wimp, so that had basically been his plan.” 

“And then,” Luke interrupted, “because he takes none of our shit and is genuinely one of the only reasons we’re still alive, Willie just shows up halfway through band practice one week, pops his head in, and says “hey, man, d’you wanna go see a movie one night? Text me when you’ve thought it through a bit.” While the rest of us watch, kisses his cheek, and then leaves?” 

“We bullied Alex  _ so  _ hard for not jumping at it, then I stole his phone and texted him.” Bobby smirked. “So really, everyone can thank me for the wonderful Willex content blessing your Instagram.” 

Jen switched her attention for him. “And whilst we’re on the topic of you, Bobby. Tell me about you and Reggie.” 

“Oh, um,” Bobby stammered for a moment. “Well, it wasn’t quite that poetic. We were in a meeting with our manager at the record label, listening to our first album, and I was on such a high that I just kissed him.”

“Then Reg panicked,” Luke said.

“So then they left, and came back like five minutes later holding hands,” Alex finished. “Then they proceeded to be the epitome of “calls you bro, but like, romantically”, until one night Reggie climbed over Willie so he could lay with me at like half midnight, and was just like bro, I’m gonna marry him, do you think Ray will walk me down the aisle?” 

Reggie shrugged. “Then Alex dragged me out and told me he planned on proposing to Willie so I wasn’t allowed to do anything until he’d done that and he wanted Ray too.”

“We joked about it when we were seventeen, and it kind of became a running joke and then one day we woke up Julie’s house, and Ray walked in and he was just like morning mijos, coffee’s on, remember your meeting at three, how does lasagna sound for dinner, and we both just said thanks, dad. And he didn’t even flinch,” Alex recalled. “And it was just like, okay. Guess we’re Molinas now. So he walked us both down the aisle, and cried both times.” 

Jen laughed. “Now, as much as I’d love to talk about your weddings all day, we have limited time, so moving on. Two cats?” 

“They’re both Willie’s fault,” all four boys chorused immediately, fist bumping each other automatically. 

“That was a very strong and very immediate reaction,” Jen said. “Wanna go into that?” 

Luke sighed and flopped back dramatically. “So, we were going for maccies at three am, I don’t know if you saw those pics of Bobby and Reg, but that’s a regular thing for us, and Willie disappeared as we walked in. Ten minutes of Alex damn near a panic attack later, and he walks in holding this absolutely tiny kitten to his chest, and immediately drops to his knees next to Alex, and says-”

“I know you don’t  _ like  _ cats, but you basically  _ are  _ a cat, so pretty please?” The four of them said. 

“- and ‘Lex just caves. Instantly.” Luke nudged Alex teasingly. 

“And then,” Bobby picked up, “six months later, almost the exact same thing happens, except we’re at a Wendy’s, and this cat has scratched Willie five times and is an absolutely  _ hellcat _ .” 

“The only people she likes are Julie, Reggie and Willie.” Alex nodded. “Which is, y’know, understandable, except I share a bed with Willie, and I have been kicked out of my own bed at all hours of the morning because she decides it’s  _ her  _ time with him.” 

Bobby and Luke winced in commiseration. 

“And finally,” Jen got out amongst laughs, “the house. It’s pretty incredible.” 

“It’s so  _ cool _ ,” Reggie breathed. “Like, it was awesome when we bought it, and every time we go on tour or vacation and we come back to it I’m just like  _ damn. We live here.  _ It never gets old.”

“Now, you guys have never done a house tour, have you?” 

“Flynn wanted us to make an MTV Cribs style thing,” Luke admitted. “But we agreed that the house is the one place we’re not sharing everything about. We’ve done videos in the kitchen, and there’s been at least one picture of Alex, drunk and passed out with the cats on top of him in the den, but it’s our private space.” 

“That’s understandable,” Jen nodded, “I can respect that. Well our time is almost up, but I have one last question. How do you avoid falling out? You four having been living on top of each other since the last time I interviewed you, and I’ve never picked up on any tension the times I’ve met up with you, and you’re just as, if not more, in sync with each other as ever.”

“Willie, Julie and Flynn,” Alex and Luke said immediately. 

Reggie and Bobby made a  _ what they said  _ gesture. 

“Julie terrifies all of us, because she knows so many secrets about all of us, and she follows through on her threats, so when we start being stupid and acting like we’re still thirteen, she makes us talk things out,” Luke explained. 

“Flynn owns all our souls,” Bobby continued, smiling fondly. “We owe her literally everything, because she’s the best person on earth, so she just does this thing where she raises her eyebrow all judgemental-like, and tells you what you’re really upset about.” 

Reggie nodded. “She can see straight through our souls. It’s a talent.” 

“And Willie just does not take our shit,” Alex said. “One time Bobby and I got in this fight, honestly I can’t even remember what over, and I was bitching about it to Willie, and he just looked at me and was just like babe, are you seriously going to ignore your best friend until he apologises over the smallest thing in the world?” 

“And then ten minutes later, Alex walked into the living room, plastered himself against me, and was just like, I still think you’re wrong, but I have been reminded that you’re one of my five best friends in the world, and that I love you, so I’m sorry for being petty,” Bobby laughed. 

“It was quite possibly the most honest apology Alex has ever given,” Luke snarked. 

Jen smiled. “Well, it sounds like you boys are destined to stay together, along with Willie, Julie and Flynn, of course.” 

“Duh,” Reggie said, looking at his boys. “They’re my family. Blood family doesn’t mean anything, we’ve proven that. But these guys, and Julie and Flynn and Willie? They’re the family I chose, and even when Alex and Luke asked me every five minutes on our wedding day if I was sure I felt okay and if I needed a hot water bottle or a painkiller, I’ve never doubted that choice for a second.”   
  


**Et Fin**

**Author's Note:**

> -for those of you with any questions regarding fibromyalgia, feel free to ask I’m very open to talking about it, but again please remember i only have my own experiences and the cursory research I’ve done to base everything off, I’m not an authority  
> -otherwise, i hope you enjoyed this disaster, comments and kudos are very much appreciated if you enjoyed it :)))  
> -feel free to request a prompt or hit me up with headcanons on my tumblr A-Tomb-With-A-View

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Triggered My Bi Crisis](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27699184) by [whatisreggieshortfor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatisreggieshortfor/pseuds/whatisreggieshortfor)




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